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2/5/2015 2:19:17 PM
2
I circumcise myself with a potato peel and eat it to release my spirit animal, the banana slug. I cut open my scrotum and let the slug die inside my gametes. My testicles decompose. I rub the dead organ and tissue on the box and chant a very dark and evil spell. Dick Cheney appears and gives me his blessing to open the box
English
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😨 the box opens as the dark lord dick cheney commands. You feel the evil power rise from your scrotum up into your gut, then up your throat out from your mouth bursts the words of the dark lord "oil companies need more tax breaks" you chant. Then as quickly as it started it stopped. But now you have the power to open the ground under your enemies and send them down to die and become more fossil fuels.
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Muh oil
