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originally posted in:Destiny Fiction Producers
Edited by Pysteria: 11/30/2017 1:32:39 AM
1

The Dark Guardian: Chapter 1 -Light and Dark.

Yes

8

No

1

Up to you

1

"DAMNIT RUN!!!" Zavala shouted. "Get on the ship!!!" Zavala reached out to me and I grabbed his hand. IT was getting closer "Pull me up!!!" I shouted back. I started to grab hold of the ship... then it happened. *KABOOM* I was knocked back and hit my head on the back of my gun. The last thing I saw was the ship taking off with Zavala yelling and the darkness surrounding me as I passed out. Unknown hours later... I woke up... feeling empty, like a body with no soul. "My light!!!" I screamed. I stood up and looked around dazed and confused. I wondered how I would get back to the city. I took a step... then another. Then I stepped on something. My ghost... drained of light, was right under me. I collapsed and picked up my ghost, almost crying... I needed to find a way home. "I need to get home," I said quietly. "I NEED TO GET HOME!" I shrieked. Then all of a sudden, a black light surrounded me, then it went down to my ghost and surrounded it with a dark light. It looked so different now. So Dark. "What... happened?" My Ghost whispered. "All I remember.. is an explosion and a ship flying away. Were on Io, right? When we were ambushed by something... That doesn't matter now. We need to find a ship and get back to the city. I'll do a scan now... There is a ship about 300 meters from here. "Alright, let's go," I said. We ran to the ship and Ghost hacked into its systems and transmitted me inside. 2 hours later "ZAVALA!" I yelled as I walked into the Hall of guardians "IM BACK BITCH" Zavala looked at me and almost fell to his feet. I started to run over to him, then Ikora and Cayde knocked me down and pinned me to the table. "What the hell are you doing!" I yelled at them. "I want to talk to Zavala!" "We will not let a creature of darkness speak to him," Ikora said. "You are not welcome here. I then realized that I was no longer a Guardian, but a Walker... someone who had the light ripped out of them and Darkness put in its place. Usually, Walkers don't survive for more than a few minutes but I've been alive for 2 hours. "Want me to end this Walker?" Cayde-6 said. "I've always wanted to kill another one." Then Zavala stepped in. "Who are you?" He said in a booming voice. "And why are you here?" "Oh come on Zavala! Don't you remember me? From Io? You left me there while you flew away. Then it struck him. "I left behind a friend a year ago... and what came back is a Walker? I don't believe you're Para. Plus, you look nothing like her." He whispered to me. I looked at my reflection on his chest piece... Then I understood. My eyes had turned Red and Purple. I had a scar that covered my left cheek. "Banish this Walker and make sure it never steps foot in this tower again." He said. I was becoming mad and something started to stir within me. "No... I'm staying here." I said. "I will not leave and you can't make me" Ikora and Cayde-6 moved back as the dark light came back. "We'll see about that... Walker," he said. I snapped. I floated into the air and drew from the darkness. I created a wizard right there and there. Zavala easily killed it and I only became angrier... I summoned an army of thralls and threw them all at the Vanguard. "IKORA CAYDE NOW!!" he yelled. I heard solar shots ring out, hitting my back and arc paralyzing me. I fell to the ground. "Well Walker, you put up a good fight. Now it's time for you to leave." He grabbed my head and tossed me out the window. As I was falling, all I could think of was making him beg for mercy... (Should I continue to chapter 2?)

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  • Edited by SonicShadow235: 10/30/2017 10:37:03 PM
    I think you need to make it longer, fill it up with more details and descriptions. Also, I personally feel that you rushed the story a bit a bit and the idea that you can summon hordes of hive just because you have darkness in you is a bit of a stretch. But I think that it's an interesting concept and would like to see more. Not trying to be mean, btw, just trying to give some helpful feedback

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