Taking a dump when my doorbell rings. I rush to the door (without wiping mind you) to see a Christian sacrificing a goat to Satan. The satanic Christian throws the box at me after completing the ritual as I throw poop in his face. Fast forward to the present day (OVER 9000!!!! Years later). I'm again sitting on the toilet thinking about how to open the box I got a bazillion years ago. I bring my options down to 3 options. I can throw the box at my cat and have him shred it open, I can put said box into the toilet at flush repeatedly to soften the cardboard and open it that way, or I can take the knife that the Christian sacrificed the goat with and open it normally with that. Decides to open it with a butter knife.