My super would be called disappointment. Then when you activate it your toon would sit in the closest corner crying (good for when you get a bad drop from the nightfall). When upgraded he/she would be able to get a laptop out so they can go on the forums and cry about it or claim that the weapon that just killed them was OP. Sorry I couldn't think of a proper one and need to have a laugh, don't take me seriously, when I think of a proper answer I'll edit this.