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Edited by Britton:
4/30/2015 4:16:36 AM
800
Creatively open this box.
Open this box in a creative manner and ill tell you whats inside.
Lack of imaginations need not apply. If you're lame the box wont open.
[b]2000+ replies[/b] best thread ever
[b]I will be replying at my leisure. Feel free to help others open the box.[/b]
1. [b][u]YOUR DICK WONT OPEN THE BOX[/u][/b]
2. Saliva isnt a good box opener either.
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Ok mythbusters style, BLOW IT UP
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I develop a complex spell that after years of training I empower myself to open the box.
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I look at the box.... The box doesn't move.... I ask the box politely to open :D
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2 RepliesBuys the box a drink.seduces box.throws babies at the box.cuts hole in box.sticks baby turtle in box.gets turtle eating dog to eat through box an d reveal its contents.
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2 RepliesTesting. Please reply to this message[spoiler]i updated my app. Hoping my notifications work now[/spoiler]
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One does not simply "open" a box...
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1 ReplyI go across the seven realms, past the snowy peaks of the Urmumsanus mountain range, through the valley of frozen parodies, and search far and wide and consul with the great king Snu Snu who decrees that OP is a fgt and then tells me to find a villager that then hands me a box opener and then I cut open the box
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5 RepliesI stare at the box. The box stares at me. The box doesn't have eyes. That makes the box's stare even scarier. A lone bead of sweat runs down my forehead. A lone bead of sweat doesn't run down the box. I try to engage the box in masculine banter. The box does not respond to my novice trash talk. I step towards the box. The box doesn't step towards me. I narrow my eyes at this display of cocky confidence. I let out a wild war cry and charge. I leap high into the air (I'm talking like, at least 40cm here) and deal the box a crushing belly slam. My belly caves in. I throw up explosively. The box gives no shits. Because a box has no rectum. Obviously. I curl up on my side and spasm uncontrollably. The box looks at me in scorn. The box still has no eyes. This makes my humiliation worse. I realise I will never be able to defeat the box and conquer it's contents. I pass out in a pool of my own vomit. I regain consciousness and find the box exactly where it was before. Because boxes don't move. Obviously. I glare at the box in rage. I stand up weakly. I realise. The box has been open all along. I feel slightly embarrassed. The box laughs at me snidely. I cry.
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I have Samuel L. Jackson yell at it, until it opens.
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12 RepliesWith a pineapple (A grenade dumbass, do you know who I am?)
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1 ReplyWalks up to box Puts it as a prop for a Michael bay movie Yeah that should do it
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2 Replies*I walk to the box in a leather jacket and black slick hair, then I do a 360 and say eyyy! Then proceed to hit the box with the right side of my right fist.*
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1 ReplyFirst I recruit NFL star Oddell Beckam Jr. to me open the box. (Sorry if your European) At the sight of Oddell the box attempts to flee by jumping away. The box sees a nearby cliff and decides that jumping off and dying is a better alternative to being opened. As it attempts to leap to its death, the box is suddenly snagged out of the air with three fingers and lands safely at the bottom of the cliff on a football stadiums end zone. The Box now knows it is defeated and opens without further resistance.
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2 Replies1. Pick up box 2. Leave in front of police station 3. Leave a note on it suggesting There is a bomb inside something along the lines of [i]i go boom[/i] 4. Watch as police take hilarious precautions to open box 5. Laugh as police are confused by what's inside 6. Quickly run by box and pick up what's inside 7. Thank police [b]thanks pigs!!![/b]
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4 RepliesThrow it out window Hits and kills some guy Go to jail Pick up the soap Get Daryl is Cocain so I can talk to big Talk to big about getting a shank Pay with the soap Get shank Escape jail Use shank to kill Walmart clerk and steal box opener Threaten someone with the box opener Make them open it
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5 Replies*I kneel down and reach towards the box in an attempt at psychokinesis.*
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4 RepliesI would fap vigorously on that box
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1 ReplyI take the box and proceed to go to a helicopter at night. The chopper takes me to New York and turns on multi colored lights and strobe lights on the blades. I then jump out with a glow in the dark parachute and start shooting flares from a multi barrel flare gun. It's playing AC DC music while a slowly go towards the Statue of Liberty. I then take out the box and while diving from the sky stick the box out and it is then ripped open by the statues torch.
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4 RepliesI was only 9 years old I loved boxes so much, I had all the merchandise and movies I pray to boxes every night before bed thanking them for the life I've been given. Box is love I say, Box is life My dad overhears me and calls me a -blam!- I knew he was just jealous of my devotion for Boxes I called him a -blam!- He slaps me and sends me to go to sleep Im crying now, and my face hurts I lay in bed and its really cold A warmth is moving towards me. I feel something touch me Its a box I am so happy He whispers in to ear "this is my box" He grabs me with his powerful box hands and puts me on my hands and knees I'm ready I spread my ass cheeks for Box He penetrates my butthole It hurts so much but I do it for Box I can feel my butt tearing as my eyes start to water I push against his force I want to please Box He roars a mighty roar as he fills my butt with his love My dad walks in Box looks him straight in the eye and says "Its all open now" Box leaves through my window Box is love, Box is life
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9 RepliesSlams with schlong
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Rip "junk" label off box. Box explodes. And it's open
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6 RepliesI'd make sure there's nothing living in the box, then i'd submerge it in a vat of liquid nitrogen, wait a couple minutes, then pull it out and crack it open.
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2 RepliesTake off the "l" from the letter B and you're left with 3.... HALF LIFE 3 CONFIRMED
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3 Replies*engages in staring contest with box
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Box starts with the letter B The box ghost is 100% ghost.
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2 RepliesStep 1. Submerge the box in ketchup Step 2. Forget about the box Step 3. Open the- Open what? Step 4. Mmmm, pizza.
