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8/3/2014 11:30:58 PM
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Just fought 3 porches AMA

I was in "The Condom Shop" buying my sister some Vaseline when all of the sudden, a porch comes over and takes it from me. I say, "Dude, what the -blam!-, I'm getting my sister some V" then, another porch whose with his daughter says "Woah, just take it easy man." I'm getting my V taken away from me by some random deck and I'm just supposed to put up with it. I say to the D "Give me my shit back, punk ass porch!" The porch with his daughter is all like "STOP THE SWEARING, THERE'S CHILDREN HERE, KEEP IT PG" I walk over to the bitch who keeps interrupting my flow. I stomp on that bitch's wood. His daughter whips a dildo at my face, sike! I catch it in my mouth! As I have the dildo in my mouth I punch the little porch and walk over to the dude trying to take my shit. He opens the door and clamps on my dildo. I push back with my feet and rip a wooden plank off with my bare hands. He throws the dildo into my bag of V, sike! My ass catches it for me! I then go over to the little girl who is nearly dead and stomp her head in. I place the dildo in her mouth so I can take care of her dad. I take a blow up naked grill and beat him with it until he die. It only took a few hours. Sadly, the criminal got away. I guess this goes to show that you shouldn't expect to kill everyone in a 3 on 1 situation.

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