I completely agree. I joined a clan for the extra bonuses, but I primarily play solo. I seek out people to check out the stuff you need fireteams for (nightfall and raids) but I solo almost everything else.
Most of the fireteams I randomly join are awful. I did Wrath of the Machine once. It was pretty good up until the end. Some people were experts, some people like me were learning. The experts were stressing out, and the people learning would get close to figuring it out, then quit. Then you'd get another guy who needed to learn all over. It was similar for the raid before that too. I usually check out the raid once or twice, but stick to other stuff to play around and raise my light level.
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had that same experience many times. have a few guys who just want to learn and a bunch of d-bags who complain and gripe because the new people are making mistakes. enough of those experiences and you will decide that raiding really isn't worth it.