The agent at the dick crime hotline said they have a full caseload. It could be months until they open a case on you. Sorry bud. I'll give you a nickname. How about "The Chode Chopper"?
Not sure how we ended up at this point but suffice it to say I have a newfound respect for you. Party on, Sir Chode Chopper. Party on. (Even though you don't know a British idiom from a dick in your ass)
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