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Edited by Masque of Night: 7/7/2016 4:18:07 AM
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Echoes Of The Past

Today, while I was driving home from my girlfriend's house, I had a thought. It was a thought i've had before, but never something I really focused much on. I was reflecting on my social ties, the people i've known, the people I still know, the people i've yet to know. However, my focus was primarily settled on the people i've drifted from over time. Those people I have known, but don't know anymore. I'm not sad when I wonder about those i've lost, to one degree or another, whether the tie was severed by time, distance, or something much more grim. I suppose the foremost feeling that I get, is curiosity. I look back on those people and wonder, "Where are you now?" Or, "Who are you now?" People change, the world changes, we change. That's just how it goes as time goes on, and people i've known in the past, that I found many years later, would seem like strangers for that very reason. A person I once knew as a friend, just isn't really a friend anymore. Maybe I changed too much, maybe they did, maybe both. But one way or another, the connection would be gone. Sometimes it would come back, although differently, and sometimes it wouldn't. But I digress, as sometimes, there just wouldn't be a "next time". I'd lose contact with someone, and that'd be it. They may as well have dropped off the face of the earth from my perspective. I can think of no better an example than that of a friend I made in college, in a Medical Terminology class I was taking at the time. His name was Josh, and he looked normal enough, though he turned out to be a pretty odd guy. And I say that for a plethora of reasons that I won't get into for time's sake, but I think that's part of why we were fast friends. Friends of a feather flock together and all that. I only knew him for, say, roughly six months. But I had a lot going on in those six months, had a kid, lost a kid. It was an emotionally turbulent time, and he was always willing to serve as an emotional support, plus would keep me kept up on the work i'd miss when I was staying at the hospital. We'd joke about stupid things, discuss serious things, or just discuss what was going on in each others lives at the time. You know, things friends would do. Anyway, he had his share of problems too, both socially and with...certain illegal substances. As time went on, he grew distant. We didn't have a class together anymore, our schedules would conflict. It'd just be difficult to find time to hang out. And, eventually, he ended up checking himself into a rehab facility. He only intended to stay a month, but that was the last I heard from him. His online social media disappeared, his number was shut down, and there was no trace of him at the place he checked into. He just...vanished. I kept his number for a while afterword, until I was clearing out my contact list. I ended up deleting it, since there was no point in keeping it, but it didn't stop me from wondering, "What happened to that guy?" Again, it doesn't sadden me. However, until the day I forget that he ever existed, i'm always going to wonder where he disappeared to. And any memories I have, will always be echoes of the past. [spoiler]If you took the time to read all that, congratulations! I hope it was worth it. If anything i've said here causes you any concern about me, I insist, don't allow it to. I'm content with the way my life has played out so far, but the past can still be an interesting thing to reflect on. And I suppose that's all this post really is. I wanted to reflect, and I wanted to post my reflection somewhere it could be seen. Maybe for the sake of external validation, perhaps to encourage other people to take a moment and think on the little things in life that tend to go unnoticed or forgotten. I don't truly know myself, to be honest, but if you have any reflections to make on this general subject, please feel free. We each have our own lives, our own stories. And each one is worth sharing, even if you might not think so.[/spoiler]

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  • I feel the same way about the whole losing friends deal. It's just a natural part of life, and there's no reason to get all bent out of shape about it. I've had a few friends in the past who've disappeared on me as well. Though your friend, Josh, totally dropped off the grid, whereas my friends just drifted away into a new friend group. For instance, I had a friend Dakota, who was in my Art class in 2nd grade. Every day we'd chill and talk and draw random stuff and he was nudes cool dude to sit down with and have fun. The next few years after he was put into a few of my classes and we made even more memories there. But once around 7th-8th grade hit, that's when our friendship began to slowly drift. Whether it was because he was into sports and always hanged out with athletic kids and I didn't care for sports at all so we didn't talk too much, or because he got into a huge friend group that really country(ish) and do a lot of farming, fishing, mudding, dirt biking, bonfires out the whazoo, etc, we still drifted. And he went on to enjoy his new friend groups that I would never dream of joining while I remained behind. As it goes with many of my friendships that fade away, actually. People go on with their lives before I do with mine, and it usually keeps me far behind everyone else. But I don't mind it at all. In fact, I don't much care for the person he's become now. I got a new friend group now who's totally awesome and accept me for the weird, crazy and cool guy I can be. Gonna start college here soon, as well as apart time job. I'm writing a book, playing some video games. Learning to tattoo here soon. Hoping to start up at the gym again soon as well. This reflecting was interesting, but being the youngster I am, I should be concentrating on making much more awesome memories with my friends and family before I reflect on old ones. I mean, I just graduated high school for Pete's sake haha.

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