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originally posted in:The City of Stories
2/14/2016 2:24:23 AM
1

Story time With SKYTECH24

It's my first venture into writing I have something else in progress that is better. I was on a flight to China, when suddenly there was engine trouble. Turns out that an Israeli paratrooper had gotten his chute caught up in the turbofan. The pilots preceded to issue a brace call as the plane went into a tailspin. Shortly after impact on the Pacific Ocean water started to flood into the plane. After a bit of quick thinking and running I made it to a life raft. I quickly pushed it out and grabbed a survival pack. I ended up floating in the raft for 3 weeks with a family of 4 Americans. We landed on the shore of a Japanese held Island; and shortly after firing off a flare we were rescued by the Japanese military. Little did we know that they wanted one slave and would let the rest of us go. I volunteered and within the month I was serving in Kazakistan alongside the Mongolian 4th infantry. After attacking an ISIS stronghold we celebrated and well I don't remember anymore of that night. Then I woke up to the oddest thing ever. I wake up in Afghanistan with a duffel bag full of Indian Rubles (for those of you that don't know that's about enough to buy a ham sandwich). There were three stoned Muslims all wrapped in flags bearing the ISIS emblem. Enough alcohol to create a second sun. There were 17 knives stuck in a virgin sheep and a pentagram drawn around it. There were also goblets of blood and enough fire arms to supply a Russian conscript army. I then quickly grabbed a AR-15 from the pile grabbed the duffel bag and ran. I stole a pickup truck that had a mounted machine gun on it and had enough drugs in the backseat to make a Mexican cartel jealous. After driving for about 20 miles I came upon an abandoned and dilapidated Russian airfield. After smashing my truck through the rusted chain link fence I identified 2 locked hangers. I shot the lock off of the first one and pushed the door open. Like a scene from a movie shafts of sunlight pierced the murky gloom and there sitting in all its hulking glory was an Antonov An-124 Ruslan. I took the next three days learning to fuel, fly and load its weaponry. On the third day I heard odd noises and spotted a herd of goats coming my way from across the desert. I began to load my pickup into the back of the plane when all of a sudden shots rang out. The goats weren't goats they were Somalian pirates here for my rubles! I fought them off with only a fire extinguisher and a letter opener. Finally, when they were all dead I flew the plane to the Canary Islands; where I raided American companies offshore funds and used the money to buy fuel for my plane. Then I flew towards Colombia. Little did I know I was being trailed by Swedish F-16's who attempted to shoot down my glorious plane. After doing some evasive maneuvers and throwing a monkey wrench into the engine of one I was safely on my way. Upon my arrival in Columbia I was held hostage by a drug cartel but, I paid my own ransom with the drugs from my truck. I then found an ancient British tank and used it to "persuade" port authority to let me on a boat bound for Cuba. Then after a brief stint in a Cuban prison I stole a small sailboat and made it to Florida under the name Pancho Villa. And that is the story of my way back to The home of the free and the brave
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