I had a recent one when I went into a movie theater bathroom after the new Star Wars movie. I was pretty drunk and the bathroom wasn't crowded after a movie for once and as I walked through the bathroom door a very ugly women blocked my way. I paused for a moment unconsciously startled by her gross face and wondering if she or I went through the wrong door until she told me in a shrill feminine voice to get out. So I immediately went into the other bathroom only to see a far more attractive woman yell at me to get out. [spoiler] after I looked at the signs again to see I was right the first time so I figure it was either a really ugly woman who went into the wrong bathroom on purpose or a man in drag.[/spoiler]

*be me* *be 7* *be inside a clothing store at a mall* *sees a bin full of panties* *grab pink lace thong* *go to your sister and tease her by saying "hey didn't you want [i][b]these?![/b][/i]"* *sister turns around* [spoiler]*its not your sister* *run away*[/spoiler]

I walk into my the kitchen during our annual "school is over party". My gf's sister is getting a drink. I slap her ass and grab her hips. She turns around and looks at me in amazement of what I've done. I stayed in my room for the rest of the night. For those who know mssquirrelhero, she doesn't know this happened so don't tell her :)

One time a random little girl walked up to me and asked me why I looked so angry, And when I said this is my normal face she refused to believe me.

Someone didn't lock the bathroom door on a plane and was just jacking off in the middle of the flight. At the exact moment I froze, the flight attendant looked in at him over my shoulder. She nearly passed out. Thankfully the plane was getting ready to land so it was over quickly.

Anytime in an elevator

An old woman once told me to move to Ireland in a restaurant.

i waited for 15 seconds holding a door for a girl to the mens bathroom

╭☞( ͡ ͡° ͜ ʖ ͡ ͡°)╭☞           \  .     .\           \     .   \           /╰U╯\

Hitler gets 420 no scoped https://youtu.be/jjx69oGIiUQ

This is just a caution that this story is just bizzare beyond belief, and all true. Like literally so weird no one could make this up. Ok so I live in a neighborhood that is somewhat spread out, and this isn't a shady/ghetto neighborhood. Nice houses and nice people: except for one man. I've never dared stepped into his house or tried to talk to him because he is so eccentric. I don't even know his name for -blam!- sake. So I like to run: at around 6:00 a.m I like to get up and take a jog, but a couple minutes in I'll end up at the start of a trail, but this man's house is right at the start of it. He is around his 60s-70s from what I can see. But that's all I know. And every morning he will go up to a bay window, and stand there completely naked. Ballsack and all. He'll just stand there and look me in the eyes, flexing his morning wood. One time I stopped, just stared at him, and he stared at me. Then I pulled out my phone, and he ran away frantically. Then the next morning I got up earlier so he wouldn't see me and taped a sign on his door window saying, "If you stare at me with twig and berries hanging out once more, I will call the police." Next morning I get up to jog, get to the trail, then this time he's wearing his speedo. That's right. Practically a rainbow man-thong. And this time he is smirking and flicking me off and dancing around, so I get on the trail and call the cops and tell them about this demonic perv. I finish the trail and turn around to head home, and lone behold I see two police cars and the man getting into the back of one of them, handcuffed and everything and he glances at me menacingly. And I've never seen him since.

Every time people stopped my family to compliment me and my sisters' hair (we all have some form of red). Literally everywhere we went.

1500th comment \(•-• )/

You at the KFC drive through and seeing crota and omnigal on a date.

Every single interaction with strangers is awkward.

Everyone thinks I'm 2 years older then I am and I trip over my words while talking every 2.1 sentences Other than that I have trouble with focus and people think I'm staring sometimes when I'm in drugged as heck out of it mode