Kuddos to you for being an adult and making your own way in the world. I not sure your middle age and mine are the same. I'm 48 so to me middle age starts around 35 or so.
I do have to agree with the other folks, your advise not the greatest. On the other hand we are the sum of our experiences so I can see where your coming from.
BTW I've been on my own for 31 years now. Well I've been married for 30 years so we've been own our own for 30 years. I will also say I consider you the exception to the rule.
I'll give you a piece of advice my father gave me. Never get in a fight with a drunk. You should always win but in the end you'll loose. If you were protecting you mom (or anyone else for that matter) that is of course different
WHY should your parents pay for your college?
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A scholarship with good grades can easily pay for most of college