OK, first off, that needs some line breaks or something. Second, dude, way to abandon your protégée, you should have tried to make your friends understand what you were trying to do, and you should have tried to explain better to the lad
English
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I know I abandoned her, everything that happened was on me;not her. I might of even reversed everything I helped her with, I hope I didn't though. I didn't want to really tell my friends about because they were underclass men, and she was doing just fine. I wish I could say sorry so I can feel some type of redemption, but I really don't want to shipwreck a already sailing ship.
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You still could, send her a letter, or an email. You never know what it could mean to have someone genuinely apologizing.