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So, as of late, I've been feeling somewhat down. A month back or so I got hit by a truck, and was injured. In fact I'm still recovering from a few of the deeper cuts today. And it put me on edge somewhat, more aware of how fragile all of our systems really are. And a few weeks later, I practically collapsed in a store and had to be dragged to the hospital, were the doctor confirmed my suspicions. A mask I used at work a year back was defunct, and as a result, I worked in a room for two days straight inhaling asbestos coated concrete dust. My lungs are filled with the stuff, and are now in an asthmatic sate, which only gets worse the more I stay in humid or very dry climates. And, of course, there's the greatly heightened potential for cancer. So, naturally, I have some reason to be a little bit bummed as of late no? Which leads to my next point. I truly do believe that the depression that comes when you really hit a low point in your life, once it arrives, it never leaves. And I believe that no doubt, every person has the potential to fall into the trap. You can make yourself a ladder, and climb out of your hole and stand up for yourself, and keep climbing, but sooner or later, you may fall back down into that hole again. And every time you do, it gets harder to climb back out of it. My trick for not falling back into things, is realizing that although I have troubles, everybody around me does. And to every person, they have their own mountain to climb. Swap shoes with them and the mountain would seem no different. And that helps keep me going, keeps me from completely slipping back down into that dark hole in the ground. But ironically, this trick that I use today, was the same thing I thought of when I was depressed. But it had the opposite effect. Depression alters your mental state, removes the colour, the fun, and the point of everything, until one morning you wake up to the sunshine on your face, and you don't even care. Imagine that. You're being given life by an impossibly enormous ball of energy in its purest form, on a small rock orbiting it, in the vastness of everything so large you could never even hope to grasp it. And your mental state is so altered, that even this is a shade of grey. The point is, depression changes how you see things, how you feel about them, and, the most important, how you feel about yourself. When I looked at things when I was depressed, and realized that people had their own troubles, some better off, and some worse off, it was instantly turned around and sent back at me. I was selfish. And it only helped push me further down the hole. The great irony about depression is that it makes you feel alone. You see all these people, places, and things, and you ask, "What's the point of it all?" When in fact, all around you there are people that have gone through the same as you, or even worse. And many of them hide their depression just like you. But here's the truth. You may seem like the smallest speck of sand on the grand scheme of things. And, at first glance, you are. You sit on a rock, in space, trapped in orbit around a ball of energy so large you'll never truly even be able to barely comprehend just how enormous it is, in an ocean of stars just like it, in a universe without end. But at the same time, you aren't. Every action you take has a reaction. That being said, every inaction does as well. That therefore means, your actions resonate for eternity. If every specific chain of events hadn't happened to you, your parents, your grandparents, great grandparents, and those before them, right down to the very foundation of our star and our planet, the person you are today, would not be you. And you might not even exist. And that means that the life you have is special. And that means that every action or inaction you take affects the outcome of countless numbers of people, both alive, and unborn, events, and everything itself. But what it really means is, [b]You are not alone.[/b] You hide yourself from a sea of people, because your mental state is so altered and warped, twisted to obscure things from you in plain sight, that you lose connection to it all. And the hardest thing to fight depression with, is the will to change. You might come out, or even be discovered, but all the help and counseling in the world won't change anything if you don't realize and acknowledge something. Your actions echo for eternity. Everything you do has a reaction and outcome that you could never hope to comprehend on such a scale that rivals even the universe itself. And it all comes down, to [i]you.[/i] [i]You[/i] have to want to change. [i]You[/i] have to be the one to stand up and fight for yourself. And when you realize this, there will always be somebody there who can help you, because you're never truly alone, no matter how far away from it all you seem.