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12/2/2014 5:44:18 AM
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I'm having kind of a rough time..

I used to have a lot of friends when I lived in ohio. 2 people I considered my brothers. 5 people I hung with daily, and at least 15 people I saw weekly. Well 2 years ago, I moved to southwest Oklahoma with a girl I was in love with. (She's military) At first it was fine, I thought I wouldn't have any problem making friends. I'm funny, I'm smart, and I love being around people. Now, 2 years later, and I don't have any friends. I don't fit in here, people just don't like me. I think I try to hard. Me and the girl got married, and were really happy! But we work conflicting schedules and only see each other twice a week. I kinda broke down today when I was looking for my spare keys in one of our closets. I opened the closet and saw a poker set I had bought it a year ago because I thought "man, when I get some buddies they're gonna love coming over and playing poker." "I'd better buy it now so I'll have it ready for my future buds." It's still in the plastic wrapping. I have never opened it. It just kind of felt like getting kicked in the nuts. Only a few of my friends from back home talk to me, and it's maybe a couple times a month. My wife has friends, but every time we go out they just tell her that I'm weird and awkward. I only have one true friend left, and that's my dad. He lives in Phoenix,(12 hours away) he talks to me at least a few times a week. And we just got home yesterday from spending the holiday with him and his wife. But we had to leave, and I've been a little upset since. I'm always alone. [spoiler]im not trying to get attention, I'm just venting I guess. [/spoiler]

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  • It may not just be you. You're probably at an age where you make a general transition from friends to family. Perhaps you moved just at that age so it wasn't gradual for you. A lot of people start moving apart in their mid-twenties (give or take). You keep some friends and lose most and distance doesn't help. Since others around you may be making this transition as well, they're not quite open to the idea of new friends or have difficulty finding time. Their friendships have already been developed and new ones are too much work. Also, if your wife is in the military there's a chance her friends are as well, or at least like-minded. They're a brotherhood and you're an outsider. Try finding a group who's into one of your hobbies. Make your own friends - don't try to win her's over if they can't be won. And if you're deperate for friends, don't SEEM desperate. Just be you and the people who like you for YOU will come around on their own.

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