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#Flood

Edited by Felicia402: 7/21/2013 5:15:11 PM
280

Criticizing and making inappropriate comments on female member's appearances

Now before I begin, I know exactly what I'm getting myself into here. I'm prepared for the flaming and the insults, but I'm going to put on my brave face here, and finally say something which I believe has been on a lot of other member's minds, but nobody wants to speak up in fear of being ridiculed. Inappropriate I've noticed some people, if not a lot of people, on these forums somehow think criticizing, comparing, and making rather disgusting comments on a females appearance is okay. Now, I'm not sure what you guys talk about privately or around your "buds" in real life (I mean, I've discussed other people's appearances before to friends in a mature manner) however do you guys do so around the actual girls you're discussing? I'm assuming not, but if you do, seriously, learn better manners. I know we all like to sit around and post images of models and actresses then critic their looks. It's all in good fun, I acknowledge that and that's fine, but when you're doing so to girls that are SEEING your comments and you're well AWARE they're seeing your comments, what makes you think that's okay? What makes you think because these females post pictures of themselves, that you have the right to say you find them unattractive or compare them to one another? This is NOT okay behavior, and it doesn't matter how much you try to justify it, [b]it never will be okay.[/b] If you went up to a girl in public and said "Meh. 5/10. Seen better", you'd be considered an asshole. If you went up to two girls in public and said one was better looking than the other, you're an asshole. Comment on a girl's picture on Facebook saying "You got a good body, your face on the other had...", you'd be considered an asshole. Just because you're anonymous and because these random females post pictures of themselves online, doesn't make you any less of an asshole. Sorry to inform you. Now before you all just start slurring comments such as; >"Well don't post pictures of yourself if you care so much!!!", (which still don't justify such horrible behavior) I don't care. I'm content with my appearance, and if I wasn't, no I wouldn't have had posted pictures of myself. It is all in good fun, and shouldn't be no different than a male member posting a picture. [b]Looks are irrelevant on a internet forum.[/b] >"Don't be so insecure!" I can ensure you, I'm not. If I was I would have NEVER made a thread like this. I'm prepared for a ton of insults coming my way for simply making this thread. >"It's an opinion! Deal with it! I can say what I want online." Sometimes it's best to keep opinions to yourself. We all can be judgmental, and I'm definitely no angel myself, but I don't be going up to be people saying negative comments about things they cannot change. That would make me a [b]mean person.[/b] It doesn't matter if you're online or in person, this is still [b]mean.[/b] >"Like if someone posts art online, I'll tell them how I truly feel so they can improve!" Unlike art, you can't change your appearance, and seriously nobody say plastic surgery. This thread was made out of curiosity, and curiosity alone. I just want to know why you guys think this behavior is okay. I was going to keep this thread within TFS, but I don't think my main target members will be able to see it. I may regret doing so, but come on guys, for once show everyone we're not such a god awful shit-tier forum. I BELIEVE IN YOU!!!

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  • Edited by Cortana Five: 7/19/2013 9:13:59 PM
    Christ, my mute list is insane thanks to this thread. Felicia, I love you in ways I can't explain. But let's back up here: I've been here since I was 11. Yikes, I know. And for many years I was conditioned to believe that I didn't own my body by ultra conservative people IRL and by the hordes of assholes on the Flood and 4chan. The judgement I'd undergo when I'd post a picture of myself or even identify myself as female (either on a forum or through XBL) would just reinforce that mentality. Society in general conditions men to treat women in such a piss poor manner, and they take that behavior with them for life. By sizing women up, men who don't know better are trying to own and control you. Summing someone up to just how they look is a means to control and a way for a bully to convince their victim that they are less than human. And it wasn't until after I graduated high school did I realize these things. And yet, I remain here. Why? Because there are people here who I love and care for and they make this place worth it. I've got the confidence and gall to say "-blam!- you" and deliver a broken nose to the nearest misogynist -blam!-wad that dares make a comment on my appearance. Because I know that how I look has nothing to do with the topic at hand. It's about their insecurity and inability to carry a conversation. The best counter to such idiots is to take that knowledge and turn them upside-down. Nothing scares a bully more than when their victim decides not to be one anymore. Sexist assholes who think they have the space to walk all over me are really just lowly jerks that I have the pleasure of not paying much heed to. Because I am not art. I am not putting myself "on display" for anybody's pleasure, unless I explicitly say I am. And anyone who thinks that's it's okay to call me a "fat bitch" over my PAX pictures from four years ago is welcome to take a hike. My physical appearance is none of anyone's business, neither is yours. Picture related. This is a picture of me along with many community members. It's a picture of ALL OF US. We're people of different ages, religion, race, genders, countries, financial situations, etc. Look at this amazing moment that many of us may look upon quite fondly. Some asshat will love to make a smart-ass comment. The shit that said person spews doesn't matter in the face of the decent human beings I've surrounded myself with. I hope you don't feel driven out of here, because we need people like you, Felicia, with the gall to stand up for yourself in the hopes of making a difference. Please, please stick around.

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