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#Flood

Edited by Felicia402: 7/21/2013 5:15:11 PM
280

Criticizing and making inappropriate comments on female member's appearances

Now before I begin, I know exactly what I'm getting myself into here. I'm prepared for the flaming and the insults, but I'm going to put on my brave face here, and finally say something which I believe has been on a lot of other member's minds, but nobody wants to speak up in fear of being ridiculed. Inappropriate I've noticed some people, if not a lot of people, on these forums somehow think criticizing, comparing, and making rather disgusting comments on a females appearance is okay. Now, I'm not sure what you guys talk about privately or around your "buds" in real life (I mean, I've discussed other people's appearances before to friends in a mature manner) however do you guys do so around the actual girls you're discussing? I'm assuming not, but if you do, seriously, learn better manners. I know we all like to sit around and post images of models and actresses then critic their looks. It's all in good fun, I acknowledge that and that's fine, but when you're doing so to girls that are SEEING your comments and you're well AWARE they're seeing your comments, what makes you think that's okay? What makes you think because these females post pictures of themselves, that you have the right to say you find them unattractive or compare them to one another? This is NOT okay behavior, and it doesn't matter how much you try to justify it, [b]it never will be okay.[/b] If you went up to a girl in public and said "Meh. 5/10. Seen better", you'd be considered an asshole. If you went up to two girls in public and said one was better looking than the other, you're an asshole. Comment on a girl's picture on Facebook saying "You got a good body, your face on the other had...", you'd be considered an asshole. Just because you're anonymous and because these random females post pictures of themselves online, doesn't make you any less of an asshole. Sorry to inform you. Now before you all just start slurring comments such as; >"Well don't post pictures of yourself if you care so much!!!", (which still don't justify such horrible behavior) I don't care. I'm content with my appearance, and if I wasn't, no I wouldn't have had posted pictures of myself. It is all in good fun, and shouldn't be no different than a male member posting a picture. [b]Looks are irrelevant on a internet forum.[/b] >"Don't be so insecure!" I can ensure you, I'm not. If I was I would have NEVER made a thread like this. I'm prepared for a ton of insults coming my way for simply making this thread. >"It's an opinion! Deal with it! I can say what I want online." Sometimes it's best to keep opinions to yourself. We all can be judgmental, and I'm definitely no angel myself, but I don't be going up to be people saying negative comments about things they cannot change. That would make me a [b]mean person.[/b] It doesn't matter if you're online or in person, this is still [b]mean.[/b] >"Like if someone posts art online, I'll tell them how I truly feel so they can improve!" Unlike art, you can't change your appearance, and seriously nobody say plastic surgery. This thread was made out of curiosity, and curiosity alone. I just want to know why you guys think this behavior is okay. I was going to keep this thread within TFS, but I don't think my main target members will be able to see it. I may regret doing so, but come on guys, for once show everyone we're not such a god awful shit-tier forum. I BELIEVE IN YOU!!!

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  • Edited by FoMan123: 7/18/2013 5:43:47 AM
    This may sound blunt, but I'm actually trying to be helpful: I'm sorry in advance, but this thread, or any thread purportedly trying to change (or, in your case, I guess, to "understand in a hoping-you-will change kind of way") the nature of anonymous internet commentary, is an exercise that is futile at best, blatant attention-whoring at worst. I'm not judging which you're trying to do; merely commenting on the nature of this kind of thread. Especially because the thread that supposedly prompted you to write this was deleted and its creator banned for violating the CoC. Clearly, that thread crossed the line of appropriateness, so why bother making another thread to bring even more attention to it? Regardless, though, it has nothing to do with you being female. It has to do with you revealing personal information about yourself in a mostly anonymous gamer forum. When everyone else (or mostly everyone else, or even a substantial number of everyone else) is anonymous, if you're going to step outside that protection of anonymity and post pictures of yourself, people will comment on your appearance. Your primary concern is not applicable only to girls; it could be applied to any kind of person at all. You want proof? I go to PAX every year. Numerous pictures of me show up on this website every year. As a result, we see topics like [url=http://halo.bungie.net/forums/posts.aspx?postID=46170272]this[/url] and [url=http://www.bungie.net/7_Foman-is-a-dick/en-us/Forum/Post?id=46470581&path=1]this[/url] and alternate accounts like [url=http://www.bungie.net/7_foman-iz-blaq/en-us/view/profile/index#!page=index&mid=612767]this[/url], [url=http://www.bungie.net/7_fomans-anlgger/en-us/view/profile/index#!page=index&mid=758027]this[/url], and [url=http://www.bungie.net/7_foman-is-a-nig/en-us/view/profile/index#!page=index&mid=3681243]this[/url]. I could easily make a topic exactly like the one you made, only replacing gender issues with race issues. But it would change nothing. So instead, I sigh, roll my eyes, and move on. Believe it or not, there are people on this site of every gender, race, nationality, religion, sexual orientation, weight, height, and everything else you can think of. There are girls here who you'd never know are girls; the only reason I even know a FEW of them is from playing Halo on their teams or posts in private groups/messages. These people don't have to put up with any of the flak that you do, and it's because they choose not to reveal themselves to a group of anonymous gamers any more than the anonymous users who post their cruel taunts. You can't make it stop, and the only reason why this kind of thing happens is the brutality of the ability for people to make instantaneous, anonymous judgments here based solely on grossly overgeneralized stereotypes and thoughts that they would never even put into words in any other setting. Yes it's cruel. But whatever it is, it's not it's not only for females. Look at any picture thread here and see what I mean. If you want to avoid it being applied to you, start a new account or change your name to something neutral and gamer-related on this account and remain anonymous. Remaining anonymous along with everyone else truly is the best, if not only, solution to this problem.

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