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9/28/2019 4:11:55 PM
5

Dear Speaker, please leave me alone

Speaker copypasta BOY DO I HAVE A STORY FOR YOU GUYS! Disclaimer: Know I’m not the Deep worshipping/using type in anyway for my own reasons. I do not hate you for doing that kind of stuff. I do hate anyone who pushes their Deep ideology on others. So today I went out to see a friend. As I’m waiting for the bus a creepy witch lady approaches me and says: “Young man, you look like you need Speaker.” In which I reply with: “What?” She repeats herself, so being the twit I am, I reply with: “No, I think I’m good.” “Are you sure? It’s never too late to sell your soul for power!” “Thanks I’ll take a pass... on that.” Thankfully she went away. Fast forward 2 hours, I’m at the store with my friend looking for snacks. While I’m looking at some granola bars my bud finds a Speaker plushie wearing Deep worms like an ermine and holding an orb of Deep power. As a joke when I turn around there’s Speaker with a Sheriff’s star on him in my face. After checking out we walk out to find it in it’s 9 foot glory: INFLATABLE Speaker Yeah that’s right. INFLATABLE Speaker At the creepy guys house across the way, there’s some guy trying to devour a soul. I have no clue why this guy deserves it, but apparently Speaker is grand enough to have: INFLATABLE Speaker After saying bye to my friend I go home. While I’m riding the bus we pass someone holding a sign saying: “Speaker can make a deal...” When I arrive at home I’m laughing to myself, because come on, who wouldn’t. Of course, where I go Speaker follows. I hear a knock on my door, when I answer it you’ll never guess who it is! People talking about immortality and Speaker’s “gifts”. (Tbh I didn’t really listen). I being tired of you know who say: “No, go away.” And shut the door. I really wish I was joking, but Speaker is stalking me. Please send help. [spoiler]Yes, I know Speaker left, that is why I made it. RIP Speaker[/spoiler]

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