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originally posted in:The New Dojo
1/17/2018 6:52:21 PM
1
“Hmmmm... now that I think about it... do you have like a mini Zeus I could carry around? Like he could sit on my shoulder and just zap people? And how much do all these cost after my free purchase?”
English
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“Well, the first one’s free and only the first one! After that it all depends on what other stuff you get! Not gonna tell you what or how you pay until you’re checking out, that would ruin the surprise!”
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“How big is the actual Ratatoskr again? Because I’m leaning on getting him.”
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“About the size of a large toddler or something similar!”
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“Hmmm, no squirrel sized versions?”
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“I could make one!”
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“Yes please! Also, what’s with the whole only wearing overalls thing? Not that I’m complaining but it’s pretty weird.”
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“Oh, I don’t really need to wear clothes, so I just wear whatever’s comfortable! If nobody can see anything I don’t want them to in the first place, why bother covering it up with clothes? I could walk around naked and nobody would actually be able to really notice! It’d just look kinda blurry! Anyways, turn around please! I’ll have your squirrel-god up in a jiffy!”
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“Turn around? Wait, how do you make these things?”
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“Well, let’s just say it has something to do with a blood ritual!” [b]She giggles while saying this, like it was as normal as eating or drinking.[/b]
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“Wait... are you gonna stab me in the back or something?”
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“What? Not your blood, silly! Mine! You’ll see! Well... Actually, you won’t see it, but you’ll hear it! Definitely! Just turn around!”
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“Ok...” He turns around.
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[b]He hears a loud crunch, some loud squishing noises, and then a squirrel chirping.[/b] “Alright! You can turn around!”
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He turns around “Didn’t that hurt?”
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[b]Her entire left leg looked like ground meat, sinew with small bits of bone stringing it together. What he had requested was on the ground beside the woman, covered in blood and bits of bone that it was.[/b] “Nah! I’m alright!”
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“...” He looked at Ratatoskr. “Come on... but... don’t touch me until you’re clean.”
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[b]The squirrel god would stand next to Tubbs, saying nothing. The Professor would stand up shakily, with the help of a table.[/b]
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“So... he’s free right?”
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“Yep! Anything else you get needs to be paid for, though!”
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“Paid for in what?”
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“Well I don’t need money... Blood! You can pay in blood!”
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“Does it have to be mine?”
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“Yep! I don’t accept payment from other people for you! It just has to be a few drops!”
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“How much would a nerf gun be, that actually nerfs people? Obviously for balancing purposes it has to be temporary but still.”
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“Same price! Everything’s just a few drops of blood! You see, I kinda just use it to heal myself, along with pretending it’s a sacrifice from a cult that doesn’t exist so my family doesn’t get pissed!”
