originally posted in:The New Dojo
[spoiler]yeah but it can't take out cars[/spoiler]
OH SHUTUP! I DON'T SEE YOU DOING ANYTHING!
[b]he pulls the Yuk.87 out of his pants and then stands up[/b]
[b]it's crossbow mode[/b]
One shot... how many people are in one of those cars? Wait, let me restart that. One shot, x amount of kills.
[b]he shoots a tire on one of the cars and gets back in cover[/b]
English
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The tire blew up, which suddenly caused the car to slide and drift into another. This caused the second car to slide as well and then suddenly flip. Shots were fired From the flipped car which shot into another car, killing its driver who stopped driving and the car behind that car hit the car in front of it. Suddenly each of the cars blew up and Michael bay appeared from under the curtain Tubbs threw to the side with a Budweiser in hand. "Now that's what I'm talking about!" He said as he took a long sip sponsored by Budweiser. More cars drove through the flames, but now there were only three left. Deity looked into the hatch behind him "How is it-HOLY SHIT WHAT DID YOU DO?!"
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[b]he looks at Diety[/b] Well I guess you could say they just got put in... [b]he puts on sunglasses[/b] CARdio arrest. [b]YEEEEEEEEEEAHH[/b] [b]-10 points for crappy pun that didn't make sense[/b]
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Micheal bay chokes on his drink and explodes. Where as deity takes his hands off the steering wheel to slow clap. "Wow. That was just...wow." More gunfire came from the cars and shot off the side view mirrors. "I'm blind here Tubbs! You gotta take those bastards out!"
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Alright! [b]he takes an arm from Michael Bay and throws it at another car's windshield[/b]
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The driver freaks the hell out and the arm apparently was set to explode, destroying the car. The other two began to go faster and faster until they were on both sides of the truck. Tubbs was sent to the floor because they began to bump and crash into the sides.
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[b]since he hit the floor and there was a hole in the back of the truck, he rolled out but grabbed onto the back last second, however he is being dragged along now[/b] DEITY! DEITY! MAKE A RIGHT! JUST TRUST ME! [spoiler]so he'll ram into the car on the right[/spoiler]
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"GOT IT!" He said as he rammed the right side of the vehicle into the car beside him. This caused the other car to drift out of control and spin out, and crash.
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DO IT TO THE OTHER ONE! WAIT! NO! THAT'S TOO EASY! [b]he opens a portal in front of the other car and another behind him[/b]
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The men see the portal and open fire through it to shoot Tubbs.
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[b]...[/b] [b]they would've drove through it unless they stopped the car...[/b]
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The car drove through the portal and crashed into the back of the truck then...?
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[b]i guess[/b] [b]Tubbs pushes his feet of the ground and jumps right before being crushed, and his hands are holding onto the back of the truck while his feet are on the windshield of the car[/b] [spoiler]remember, he was hanging onto the back of the truck[/spoiler] [b]he kicks through the windshield and kicks the driver's face with super strength[/b]
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The drivers head exploded from the force and somehow this makes the car explode, sending Tubbs back into the truck and landing on the calf.
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JESUS MY BACK! [b]he rolls off the calf holding his back[/b] Why did I have to land on the hardest thing in the dang truck!?
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"Because it takes up like 90% of it right now! Are they off of us?!" He asked.
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I think so...
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"Oh thank God!" He said in relief. The truck continued to drive for an hour or so, and Deity continued to check for anyone around. But it seemed that there was no one. He slowed his foot on the brakes and brought the truck to a halt. "Let's take a look at this baby shall we?" He said as he hopped out of the truck and walked to the back where Tubbs was sitting. As he eyed it he gave a low whistle. "Wow!"
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Don't you mean... "Cow!"!? Get it!?
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"That was... Good fu[i]c[/i]king lord you just ruined the moment." He crossed his arms and took In the view of the artifact. "This thing is gunna sell like no tomorrow. That's for damn sure. Hell, I could probably rebuild the entire damn castle and still have enough to purchase some men to go along with it!" He turned to Tubbs. "And, you'll be getting a hefty share of it as well..."
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But how much do I get?
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"Gotta sell it first. But let's just say, it'll be a lot more than you currently have." He offered his hand to Tubbs, for a handshake. "Either way, thanks Grim."
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51 percent
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"What?" He asked
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Did I stutter? I said I want 51 percent!
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"After I broke you out of prison. Gave you the info about the calf and offered to take you on the trip? Absolutely not. You're lucky if you get twenty at this rate." He put blatantly. "You did good with the cars, sure. But I could have just as well called up Roy, and he would have cut the time we took to do this by half, and there would be less casualties and brand damaging."