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originally posted in:The New Dojo
2/15/2017 12:28:04 AM
1
Deity got out of the jeep and dusted himself off as the men landed around them.
"Long story. It involved a priest, a gypsie and a man with a really long beard. It doesn't matter. What does matter is that I know where the calf is. It's being sold twenty miles from here to some criminal overlord. He digs old biblical artifacts. So we're gunna hop in there, shoot some bad guys and sell the shit out of a false god. Sounds good?"
English
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[b]...[/b] [b]they would've drove through it unless they stopped the car...[/b]
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The car drove through the portal and crashed into the back of the truck then...?
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[b]i guess[/b] [b]Tubbs pushes his feet of the ground and jumps right before being crushed, and his hands are holding onto the back of the truck while his feet are on the windshield of the car[/b] [spoiler]remember, he was hanging onto the back of the truck[/spoiler] [b]he kicks through the windshield and kicks the driver's face with super strength[/b]
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The drivers head exploded from the force and somehow this makes the car explode, sending Tubbs back into the truck and landing on the calf.
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JESUS MY BACK! [b]he rolls off the calf holding his back[/b] Why did I have to land on the hardest thing in the dang truck!?
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"Because it takes up like 90% of it right now! Are they off of us?!" He asked.
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I think so...
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"Oh thank God!" He said in relief. The truck continued to drive for an hour or so, and Deity continued to check for anyone around. But it seemed that there was no one. He slowed his foot on the brakes and brought the truck to a halt. "Let's take a look at this baby shall we?" He said as he hopped out of the truck and walked to the back where Tubbs was sitting. As he eyed it he gave a low whistle. "Wow!"
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Don't you mean... "Cow!"!? Get it!?
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"That was... Good fu[i]c[/i]king lord you just ruined the moment." He crossed his arms and took In the view of the artifact. "This thing is gunna sell like no tomorrow. That's for damn sure. Hell, I could probably rebuild the entire damn castle and still have enough to purchase some men to go along with it!" He turned to Tubbs. "And, you'll be getting a hefty share of it as well..."
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But how much do I get?
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"Gotta sell it first. But let's just say, it'll be a lot more than you currently have." He offered his hand to Tubbs, for a handshake. "Either way, thanks Grim."
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51 percent
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"What?" He asked
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Did I stutter? I said I want 51 percent!
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"After I broke you out of prison. Gave you the info about the calf and offered to take you on the trip? Absolutely not. You're lucky if you get twenty at this rate." He put blatantly. "You did good with the cars, sure. But I could have just as well called up Roy, and he would have cut the time we took to do this by half, and there would be less casualties and brand damaging."
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I'll drop to 50 percent but that's it.
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"You can get fifty percent of forty percent."
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So that's like... 90 percent!? I'll take it! [spoiler]yes I know it's 20 percent[/spoiler]
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[spoiler]Lmao![/spoiler] "Yes! It totally is! Good job genius! Now get back in the damn truck!" [spoiler]the end[/spoiler]
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[spoiler]it's not over[/spoiler] [spoiler]until I say it's over[/spoiler] Kk. [b]he gets in and they drive away happily ever after except one time when a skunk sprays Deity[/b] [spoiler]the end[/spoiler]
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I WOULD SAY DO IT TO THE OTHER CAR BUT THAT'D BE TOO EASY! [b]he opens a portal beside the other car and another portal behind him[/b]
