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originally posted in:The New Dojo
11/28/2016 9:07:16 PM
1
"Yeah. It was for the better. I understand that... I do."
[b]He sighs, picking up the blade [/b]
"I complain about Pontiff, yet I hold a relic of his. Hypocritical perhaps?"
[b]He sheaths it on his back.[/b]
English
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Nah, it means you have a friend
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"In what way?"
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Well, you complain about him, and yet you hold onto something that he gave to you. If you weren't his friend you wouldn't have the blade.
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"I killed Pontiff. The way I killed Aldrich. The way I killed Hawkwood." [b]He sighs [/b] "I spoke to him true, he told me his story. But I took the weapon after defeating him."
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But you keep his weapon. You keep it because you want him to stay with you beyond his grave.
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"I suppose in a way that is very true."
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Yes... Why don't I help you cheer up?
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"How do you plan on that?"
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Well I have this one joke... *Mortar takes a deep breath before continuing* A tourist is backpacking through the highlands of Scotland, and he stops at a pub to get a drink. And the only people in there is a bartender and an old man nursing a beer. And he orders a pint, and they sit in silence for a while. And suddenly the old man turns to him and goes, "You see this bar? I built this bar with my bare hands from the finest wood in the county. Gave it more love and care than my own child. But do they call me MacGregor the bar builder? No." Points out the window. "You see that stone wall out there? I built that stone wall with my bare hands. Found every stone, placed them just so through the rain and the cold. But do they call me MacGregor the stone wall builder? No." Points out the window. "You see that pier on the lake out there? I built that pier with my bare hands. Drove the pilings against the tide of the sand, plank by plank. But do they call me MacGregor the pier builder? No. But you -blam!- one goat ... "
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"MacGregor the goat -blam!-er?" [b]Kross laughs and doubles over, trying to catch his breath[/b]
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I know! I got the joke off a youtube video too! of all places! *He laughs a little too*
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"A youtu.be video? Shame it's cancer now."
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Cancer? I found it off an inspirational video from TED. THAT'S the funny part
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"Ted created an inspirational video?"
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No, a company called TED. Someone from Pixar was on the video and made the joke. [spoiler]This is an actual video. Look up "TED talk Pixar" on Youtube[/spoiler]
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"Aha I see. That makes sense I suppose."
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Yeah... It's weird, but that joke killed me when i first heard it
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"Yeah I can see how that would kill"
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Yeah... *He chuckles slightly* I have a whole arsenal of jokes like that
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"Oh Gwyn. Please don't."
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Don't worry, you're good. Though I think you'll either laugh or strangle me if you hear my Pink Ping Ball joke
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"I'll go with strangle."
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Ah, you heard it before
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"Yeah I did."
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Funny
