Welcome to the rebirth of the Unofficial Weekly Update! While you wait for the official update to drop, here is a little something to sink your teeth into! [b]Today's poll[/b]: Should Skeleton Keys drop with the first completion of a public event as opposed to a legendary engram? I put the feelers out into the Destiny universe to see who would like to be interviewed, and, while there were a lot of responses I decided to go with an old friend from way back. Ladies and Gentleman, returning to us again, Sepiks Prime!! [b]Sepiks Prime! Good to see-[/b] It's Sepiks Perfected now, mortal. [b]Right. Gotcha. So, Sepiks, tell-[/b] Perfected. [b]I'm sorry?[/b] You will refer to me as Sepiks Perfected, mortal. I command you. [b]Look, I just got back from a long break, and I really don't want to have to deal with any crazy, so how about you-[/b] Listen here: remember when I told you that I was there for the first Strike ever in Destiny? Remember when I told you that no matter how many times you killed me, I would just come back for more, proving that you cannot kill me? Remember when I TOLD YOU THAT I AM THE STAR OF DESTINY? THAT I AM THE ALPHA? [b]Christ...here we go...[/b] I AM THE BEGINNING OF ALL THINGS DESTINY, MORTAL! ~sigh~ You will show the proper respect I am due. While once a God was I, More Godder is I now. [b]More Godder? Godder isn't even a word, and more Godder is a grammatical travesty...actually most of what you just said is a fail...[/b] I am More Godder now than I was before. A God to Gods. I was there at the beginning to prove you can't kill me, and I am back now to prove that not only did you not kill me then, but you can't kill me now even if you think you killed me because I exploded. Spoiler: STILL NOT DEAD! [b]Okay fine. Sepiks Perfected...how did you get Perfected in the first place?[/b] You mean how did I become More Godder? [b]Whatever, sure...[/b] It's simple. You Guardians are all trash, and I was deserving. You see, when you can be “killed” two million times an hour, often thousands of times at the same time, and still be ready for the next round, that says something. Siva chose me to be More Godder. [b]So...doesn't that make SIVA like, your god?[/b] Are you kidding me right now? Is he kidding me?! WHO THE F*** DOES HE THINK HE'S TALKING TO?! DOES HE HAVE ANY DAMNED IDEA WHAT I'M CAPABLE OF?! [b]...who are you talking to?[/b] SEPIKS PERFECTED IS GOD! MORE GODDER! ANSWERS TO NOBODY YOU HEAR ME?! [b]Alrighty then...uh...so why do you-[/b] Don't ever forget that I was there at the birth of you pieces of Traveler Trash, I have always been there, and I am here again! [b]ALRIGHT I GOT IT. Can we please continue?[/b] Ask your pointless questions, mortal. [b]You are a God, correct?[/b] Indeed. [b]Capable of doing anything?[/b] And everything, what is the point of this? [b]Can you create a rock so big that you can't lift it?[/b] Excuse me? [b]Can you create a rock that is so big and heavy, even you cannot lift it?[/b] Pffft. Of course I can! [b]Then you aren't a God who can do anything are you?[/b] I...huh? [b]Nevermind.[/b] I sense you mocking me. [b]Why do you need a shield if you are a God?[/b] You are mocking me. Let me show you what happens when you annoy a God. ~Transmats a Cell Phone~ I happen to know a certain individual in the Universe that would love to know you are back, mortal. A certain Hive Witch...right here on speed dial... [b]You wouldn't DARE...[/b] I DO WHAT I WANT WHEN I WANT, AND I'M TELLING HER THAT YOU'RE BACK! YOU THINK YOU CAN MOCK ME AND GET AWAY WITH IT? ~dials phone~ [b]Whatever man, do you. [/b] I'm telling her. You watch. [b]So help me God-[/b] I'm not helping you with shit. [b]Okay, we're done here. There you have it folks! The return of Sepiks Prime! [/b] PERFECTED! [b]SHUT UP, NOBODY CARES![/b] Xur showed up at the Reef last week bringing with him his usual assorted, yellow goodies. His shooty piece for the week was the Monte Carlo, famous for making OP melee builds in PvE! Hope you got one! For Warlocks, he brought the brand new Transversive Steps for the Warlock. The new boots have gathered attention lately as they allow instant reload of a gun by picking up ammo for it. Also, you move faster when you are crouched. For Titans he brought the ever useful Twilight Garrison, and for Hunters he brought the Celestial Nighthawk! The exotic pulse rifle, Outbreak Prime has finally been discovered! Popular streamer Datto was able to finally break the code and begin the quest that led to the discovery of the weapon! Just a few days ago, Bungie released an ARG that required players to do some puzzle solving and math that eventually led to the quest being activated within the new Raid, Wrath of the Machine. The pulse rifle drops at 390 light level, and has what appears to be TWO (ooooh two!) exotic perks: one that sends little SIVA Wolfpack rounds at other dudes on precision kills, and one that does damage over time to other enemies if the target takes repeated hits. One formuite said, “And to think I was this close to figuring out what ARG stood for. Maybe next time. Many fear the gun will dominate Crucible much like Thorn did; nerf posts are expected in the coming weeks. Wrath of the Machine has been conquered, but that wasn't good enough for the Legend Himself, who saw the pithy whining of six man teams who couldn't do it, and did it with three people. You know, just to see if he could do it. Of course he could. Congrats to him for the feat! An exploit at the zamboni has been discovered as well which allows players to glitch through the walls the Zamboni breaks down without actually having to do the fight at all, so long as you do it before triggering the checkpoint. The exotic chest still spawns. “Where's the fun in that?” one player was quoted as saying. Another didn't see the fun in doing it, saying, “That part sucks ass anyway...” A rumor suggests that our characters and gear may not carry over to Destiny 2. If true, this rumor seems to upend what Bungie had made evident in the past. The rumor suggests that Destiny 2 wants to feel like a new game, and if new characters are needed for that, then so be it. Most people seem to be against this change; one topic was posted, “Please Bungie, don't delete our work.” “It's Bungie, they'll do it to us despite our pleas, and we'll just come back,” another forumite said. There is a question as to whether or not Cozmo is skilled enough to play a Warlock. While interviewing Clan Redeem, who beat the Wrath of the Machine Raid first, he asked a question about what classes and weapons were used. Upon finding out that no Warlocks were used, he quipped, “More proof that Titans and Hunters are the best.” It has been floated that clearly Cozmo likes easy mode characters, and is incapable of understanding the nuances of a skill class like the Warlock, and his statement seems to confirm that. While it takes skill to panic slam, hide in bubbles, mindlessly chuck hammers, shoot a bow, go invisible, have an extra throwing knife attack, shadestep, shoot one hit kill bullets or have a triple jump, one does need to wonder, why do you Hunters and Titans need all that? Warlocks sure don't. Scrubs ;) That's all we have time for this week Guardians! Wanted to keep this one short and sweet for my return, and my many thanks to those that supported the return of this! You guys are all awesome, and it feels good to be back! So until next week, keep those guns piping hot and those Strange Coins handy. I'll see you in the Wild!