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Edited by nephilim: 6/20/2016 3:29:04 AM
172

Roast me

Make anything up, roast me, I need to feel bad. [u]Top five roasts:[/u] [b]An Traffic Cone Agent Hel Ines TopDifficulty DocSawBones CaptainWu[/b] Edit: I wanted to make it top five now because this thread got a lot more attention than I thought. Edit: Jeez, really putting this thread up there. A lot of your guy's roasts are really good and don't feel like you didn't do a good job making the top 5, I appreciate the effort.
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#Offtopic #roast

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  • What the -blam!- did you just -blam!-ing say about me, you little casul? I’ll have you know I ranked top of my covenant in the Sunbros, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Ornstein and Smough, and I have over 300 slotted sunlight spears. I am trained in spamming Wrath of the Gods and I have the highest poise in the entire US server. You are nothing to me but just another dexfag. I will wipe you the -blam!- out with backstabs the likes of which has never been seen before in Lordran, mark my -blam!-ing words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me after getting rekt in a duel? Think again, kiddo. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across Lordran and your summon sign is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, casul. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your humanity(stat). You’re -blam!-ing rekt, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my +5 chaos zwei. Not only am I extensively trained in stunlocking, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the Sunbros and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of my world, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” emote was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your -blam!-ing buttons. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. Git gud, casul.

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