Post the most cringeworthy material you got. Here I'll start.
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Sigh. Here's how this is going to happen, OP. I'm going to buy you a nice dinner and take you back to my place. I'm going to spread your tender ass cheeks and firmly press my lips against your tan, tight ass hole. Then I'm going to suck the life out of you through your ass crevice. And suck. And suck. And suck.