I never thought an activity would make me want to [b]cut the webbings of my toes with copier paper[/b], and yet, here is [i]Rift on [b]Cathedral of Dusk[/b][/i] proving me wrong.
I...I even played it solo. [i]Once.[/i] Because that's all it took to turn my frown [b][i]further[/i][/b] down, then put it through the [b]SRL[/b] fans, deform its spire and gift it to the Architects.
Months ago, when [b]Clash[/b] was the IB activity, I thought to myself: [quote]Cool! I hope they never have Rift as Iron Banner, though. Pshh, why would they even, that wouldn't make sense. I've seen Icebreaker nerfs that make more sense than that.[/quote]Well, cover me in honey and call me Sally, [b][i]IT'S RIFT!![/i][/b] Which isn't a [b][i]bad[/i][/b] thing, unless winning is your objective. To further rub salt into my oriface, [b][i]Cathedral of Dusk.[/i][/b] <--- That sentence doesn't even finish properly, nor does it need to. Simply; [i]because Cathedral of Dusk.[/i]
With the cherry on the -!wecantevencensorthisword-! cake, I now have to [b]LFG[/b] for Iron Banner. [b][i]FOR IRON BANNER.[/i][/b] I have 10 pages of friends I've acquired over Y1 of Destiny. Guess how many were online?
[spoiler]2.[/spoiler][spoiler]2 people, not two pages.[/spoiler]
[b][i]So,[/i][/b] LFG it is. LFG isn't ready for me.
My witty overly-suggestive banter mixed with my [b][i]very[/i][/b] inconsistent [b]1.0 K/D[/b] mixed with the sporadic loud shrieking that living with a cat and a woman entails tends to put people off. Or, at least confuse them.
So, [b][i]*raises glass*[/i][/b] this one's to you, [i]Cathedral of Dusk.[/i] May your match timers run out, and your participants have John Cena legs.
[b]Edit:[/b] If you don't like this [url=https://www.bungie.net/en-us/Forum/Post/184461115/0/0]map on control[/url]
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A friend got lost on Cathedral of Dusk in October and we found him today. He's now 42 years old with a wife and kids and he's made a little hut by Top Heavy with all those old floating Guardian corpses.