Tl;dr but I agree with the title. I hate rift but will play. My team will be wiped by stormcallers. I will die by misadventures. I will grab the spark and take a sniper bullet to the face immediately after. I will try and kill the runner (likely a hunter) just to miss every damn shot because they're hopping around like a cracked out kangaroo. I will also have fun and hate myself for it.