I would have believed this if you did a couple things differently.
English
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The addition of the drinking problem took away from the original troll and came out of left field, making the entire post seem contrived. Also, I feel like the kind of regret you were trying to portray is one of a sorrowful but now thoughtful husband who's lost everything; so I'd do a tiny bit better on punctuation. The run on thing had a kind of distress to it, but your words came off as calm. It would still need work after that, but it'd be a solid B if you fixed those two things next time. Also, minimizing hashtags may help. I mean... I still don't know what you were trying to accomplish, but minimizing hashtags may help you bait more of...whoever it is you're trying to bait.
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which things
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All of it
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who asked you peewee
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And 'peewee?' Lol made my day m8
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No one (-:
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case closed