Have you ever tasted spam before? Oh, how the look of it just makes my tastebuds tingle. My parents usually keep me with a stable supply of it, but recently my addiction has gotten...out of hand. I ate all of it, in record time. I persuaded my parents to go and buy me more. The day passed while I waited for them to come back, and my stomach beckoned me for more spam. In a desperate attempt to quench my thirst, I decided to do the next best thing. I found my family's deposit of salt in the pantries and popped open the cap. I dumped all of the salt in my mouth and held it on my tongue. The salt was just pure sex to my taste buds, but not enough. I needed that spam. My parents came home two hours later, two hours I spent in the corner reminiscing about spam. They came in and gave me the spam, along with an assortment of cereal. I didn't care about the cereal. I grabbed the spam and ran to my room. I ripped the lid off and began devouring it. The taste of the unnaturally salty spam was pure euphoria. Something happened that day, something revolutionary. The spam made me produce an orgasm. I needed more.