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Your form over parenting is what screws children over in the long run. You are doing all of the thinking for them and that's not healthy.
Now before I go to crazy I'm 32 I'm a disabled veteran I have 3 kids, 2 with my ex wife and 1 with my current wife. There ages are 10, 8 and 5. This is just so you know I'm not some kid trying to be insulting this is not my intent.
Now on to my point. Also I'm not saying you do any of the following I'm just answering the question so please let's keep this constructive. If you let your children play a video game and you don't have constructive talks with them about their gaming habits and who they play with online your already wrong. My oldest loves playing minecraft and I monitor who he plays with. He also plays call of duty and other FPS games with me as well.
After every few games we have a talk about the difference between real life and video games and I give him a scenario that he must find a real and practical way to solve. I also have him solve it again using a video game strategy just for fun. This allows me to judge what lines may or may not have been crossed and lightly parent him in the right direction.
Outright saying that they can NOT play a game is a surefire way to set them on a path of disobedience and lying. How? You ask, it's simple they have friends who have the game and they will play it behind your back and tell you nothing. It's like telling them if I ever catch you drinking you will be grounded for life!! Again they will just do it behind your back.
If you provide children with a safe non judgemental place to learn and experience things you will breed trust which is much more powerful than anything else when it comes to children.
This is how I was raised and this has been working great for me while raising my kids. It's not necessarily the best way and definitely not the only way but trust me it works. I never lied to my parents when they caught me coming home drunk and they punished me for it. But after my dad would hand me a beer drag me outside and we would talk about what happened and I learned from it.
Everything goes hand in hand and forbidding anything without discussion or experience WILL backfire every time. And experience goes both ways for you and the kids. If you know and they don't then play with them games are more fun that way anyway don't you think?
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