What if everything you ever wanted...
WAS TO KICK SHIT IN THE FACE!? FOREVER!
[b]THEN YOU NEED[u] PEREGRINE GREAVES[/u]!!![/b]
PUT THESE[b] SWEET-ASS LEGS ON YOUR TITAN[/b] AND[b] YOU WILL F***ING DECIMATE THINGS WITH YOUR POWERFUL KNEES[/b]. THEY ARE[b] GEMS[/b]. YOU WILL LOOK [b]GLAMOROUS[/b] LIKE A [b]STYLISH LADY[/b] WHILE YOU [b]KNEE SOMEONE IN THE THROAT SO HARD THEIR TEETH GO FLYING OUT OF THEIR ASSHOLE![/b] YOUR LEGS ARE [b]BEDAZZLED! [/b]BEDAZZLED WITH THE[b] STRENGTH OF 1,000 KODIAK BEARS[/b] IF KODIAK BEARS GAVE[b] ZERO F***S[/b] ABOUT GRAVITY AND EVOLVED TO DO [b]SWEET JUMPKICKS! [/b]
YOU WILL SET YOUR CHILD ON YOUR KNEE TO GIVE HIM SOUND FATHERLY ADVICE AND[b] THAT CHILD WILL F***ING EXPLODE[/b] BECAUSE [b]YOUR KNEES ARE INSTANT DEATH![/b][b] YOUR SON WILL DIE! [/b]YOUR WIFE WILL DIVORCE YOU! [b]YOU WILL DIE ALONE ATOP THE MOUNTAIN OF CORPSES YOU'VE LEFT IN YOUR WAKE AS YOUR LIFE DISSOLVES INTO A NIGHTMARISH HELLSCAPE OF VIOLENCE AND DEPRAVITY! [/b]
YOU WILL[b] TAKE PEREGRINE GREAVES INTO THE CRUCIBLE [/b]AND YOU WILL[b] MASSACRE PEOPLE![/b] YOU WILL[b] F*** THEM UP![/b]
[b]YOU WILL KNEE BLADEDANCERS![/b] DENIED! [b]GET THAT BUTTERKNIFE THE F*** OUT OF HERE![/b]
[b]YOU WILL KNEE RADIANT WARLOCKS [/b]AND CAUSE THEM TO [b]WEEP RADIANT TEARS![/b]
[b]YOU WILL KNEE GOLDEN GUNSLINGERS[/b]...[b][i]CAREFULLY[/i][/b]....
[b]YOU WILL KNEE OTHER TITANS IN THEIR BUBBLES[/b], DIVING INTO THEIR[b] NEON DISCO DANCE PARTIES BLIND AS SHIT[/b] AND [b]MURDERING [/b]THEM WITH YOUR[b] ENERGY LEGS[/b]! IT IS[b] YOUR BUBBLE NOW SO FU*** THAT GU[/b]---wait, shit...[b]THE BUBBLE IS GONE BECAUSE OF YOU GODDAMMIT WHY THE F*** DID YOU DO THAT!? [/b]
YOU WILL[b] RUIN YOUR K/D[/b] LIKE I HAVE BECAUSE YOU ARE[b] ADDICTED[/b] TO THE SWEET,[i] SWEET[/i] SOUND OF [b]INSTANT AIRBORNE DEATH[/b]! YOU WILL CATCH SO MANY [b]SHOTGUN BLASTS TO THE FACE [/b]AND IT WILL BE [b]WORTH IT[/b] WHEN YOU [b]KNOCK A BLADEDANCER THE F*** OUT[/b] BEFORE HE CAN CHOP UP YOUR TEAM![b] EVERY PAINFUL DEATH WILL BE VALIDATED [/b]AS[b] YOUR LEG COLLIDES WITH A FIERY WARLOCK'S FAGGY GOAT HAT SO HARD THAT HE'S RENDERED BRAIN-DAMAGED[/b] AND HIS FAMILY[b] FIGHTS WITH THE STATE OF TEXAS[/b] TO [b]TAKE HIM OFF OF LIFE-SUPPORT! HE WILL LIVE OFF OF TUBES! BECAUSE OF[i] TEXAAAAAAS! [/i]
[/b]
[b]PEREGRINE[i] GREEAAAAAAAAAAVES[/i]!!![/b]
[b]EDIT:[/b] [b]YOU WILL KNEE TITANS PANIC-FISTING...and...[/b] shit. IT DOES [b]NOT END WELL[/b] IF "[b]UNSTOPPABLE[/b]" IS ACTIVE. THANKS, xSHIBBYx !
EDIT AGAIN: [b]I HAVE REVIEWED THE LORD OF WOLVES:[/b] https://www.bungie.net/en/Forum/Post/145107737/0/0
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NECROBUMP!
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Necrobump
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This was my counter to it all
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The flying knee of Arc-based fury got me through the last IB Do you have any idea how far a Bladedancer can fly on Twilight Gap after a knee to the face? The answer is quite far.
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Power thirst reference, so perfect.
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Crying God bless Texas
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Oh my goodness I missed this post. Shame the greaves didn't make it to year 2.
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Revived
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Powerthirst knockoff
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Edited by Always Feral: 10/5/2015 4:32:51 AM
Started a new topic: LORD OF WOOOOLLLVESSSS!!!!(179 Replies))
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I read all of this in torgues voice from borderlands
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Necrobump
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Machoke used Focus Energy! [spoiler]Machoke is getting bumped![/spoiler]
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This is still funny
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Edited by koolaidman565: 9/8/2015 4:20:26 AMTHREAD OP YOU SHOULD EDIT AND PUT THIS CLIP ON THE THREAD! PEREGRINE GREAVES!!!! [spoiler]kneed 2 bladedancer in a 1v3[/spoiler]
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BUT BE CAREFUL NOT TO KNEE YOUR BALLS!!!!!!!!!
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NECRO [spoiler]the first one didn't work lol[/spoiler]
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Where's Billy Mays when you need him?
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I find myself mysteriously, yet happily, erect. Thanks OP, i need the laugh. ~spartaboy777
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[b]WHAT ARE THOOOOOOOOOOOSE[/b]
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Edited by ThinkGod: 9/7/2015 11:32:21 PMF***ING PEREGRINE GREAVES WILL COME AT YOU LIKE MY DIVORCED WIFE CAME AND TOOK MY KIDS!!!!!!! [b][i]PEREGRINE GREEEEEEEEEEEEAVES!!!![/i][/b]
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NECRO
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DID YOU KNOW THAT NINETY-SEVEN PERCENT OF ALL LIVING THINGS ON EARTH AREN'T BEING KNEED RIGHT NOW? THAT'S BULLSH*T, USE PEREGRINE GREAVES.
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Do mida multi tool !!!!
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They do kick ass. I just kind of wish they did something else like extend the range of the kick or even give you that perk for free so I could pick the overshield up as well.