It is true. They can only perform against set AI characters and are incapable of functioning in a highly unpredictable environment like the crucible. You should all just quit. The only way to earn stuff in this game is PvP. Git gud skrubs.
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Sarcasm on the Internet is a true art form. Sadly most people doing "satire" post barely make a post funny enough to be considered down syndrome let alone truely humorous. So next time you have the urge to make a satire post ask a few questions of yourself. Is this post actally funny or witty? Does it sound just as bad a troll post I am in theory mocking? If it sounds like a troll post with zero humor, congratulations you are not any better then a common forum troll, stop posting garbage.