Only girl I'll probably ever love sent me this: I cant say that I've only talked to one guy, which is you. But I cant deny that a part of me loosens up when talking to you. Immature jokes and racist comments became a part of our friendship. There was a time when I was sure of my feelings, but I really never had the guts to tell you because I thought that you'd never reciprocate it, you being heartless and all (haha) So I guarded myself, emotionally staying away from and forcing myself to believe that you only want me as friend, so imagine my suprise when you told me you did reciprocate those feelings. I dont know exactly when but I realized that this whole thing wouldn't happen. I knew that if I mess something, which is bound to happen, I knew that our friendship will be ruined. Think about this, would you throw away two years of friendship for a chance at something else? Maybe you'd answer yes but face it, I'm scared. I can't do the "risk it" thing John told me about. I know I'm being selfish, making you hide your feelings to be my friend, and I'm really sorry about that. Honestly, I dont even know what to do now. Telling you to move on seems insensitive of me, but I really have no choice. I cant let you think that something's going to happen between us. I'm sorry.