[b]Shining Rivers, Great Roads[/b]
There are brilliant rivers
Shining and alone,
But under her waters,
There are bones.
So like the streets and roads of Rome
Where many made their homes,
Under their splendor upon which you tread,
Lies the the bodies of those long dead.
That die breaking their backs for the empire they serve,
Only to be remembered as nothing but serfs.
So here we are again,
Walking these broken streets where the dead lie,
Trying to find where we began.
English
#Offtopic
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Do not diminish your works. They are your marks of progress. And you have dared to lay them out for the public to see. There are few who manage that. So take pride, and aim high.
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from afar, mount tai looks blackish, narrow on top and wide at the bottom. if you flipped it upside down, it would be narrow at the bottom and wide on top.
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Edited by Double07: 4/18/2021 2:53:13 AMI contact that. Epic song. Profit.
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[quote] That die breaking their backs for the empire they serve, [/quote] While I'm not a native english speaker I feel like this sentence has no rythm and isn't compatible with the one in the other lines, also it causes the word play on "dead" become repetetive. Other than that it's nice.
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While its great overall, i can't help but feel the title doesn't match with the poem, can't tell y though...
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👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻 that was actually really good. Great job! [spoiler]nibbles crayon[/spoiler]
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That's... actually good! You lowered my expectations with the whole "feeble" thing but damn! That's great.
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celacovsci
Molon Labe Domari Nolo - old
Actually pretty good tbh -
you call that feeble? it's not bad at all!
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The first four lines don't really seem to fit with the rest of the poem, but it's still neato
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Nice 👍